Parents-

Ultimately, the training teaches parents other ways to deal with their children’s truancy problems. The training provides instructions in proper and effective methods of communication. Above all, the training provides a forum for parents who feel they are alone, dealing with difficult children. Parents come together and listen to each other, comfort each other and laugh with each other during group talking sessions. Their problems do not seem as unattainable and insurmountable as they first did. Parents learn how to speak to their children, and they learn how to listen. They learn to celebrate themselves and their children and also take the time to celebrate their victories and not get discouraged when they face difficulties in dealing with their lives and their children.

Students-

The training calls for particular attention to reach the students. Students are taught how to analyze their options and choose the one with the best return for their future. Often, these pre-teenagers and teenagers are pressured by friends to cut school and be disobedient to their parents. The training teaches our students to be independent thinkers and provides them with coping skills, communication skills and patience. Older students work closely with younger children to develop those communication and patience skills. They also receive resume writing and job training workshops.

Jane Williams

Skills Training for Parents and Youth

Q. Who is the youth causing you to attend parenting skills class and how old is your child?

A. Grandson: Anthony Ingram D.O.B. 7-3-86

Q. Did you have to go to court, if so, how did you feel about going to court?

A. Yes! I didn't want to go to court. I was feeling that I had done something wrong and everybody would know. But, I went and after going to the first parenting class, I didn't feel alone. Other parents had problems like me and worst than me, and I said "Oh, I'm going to like this." I enjoyed meeting new people and looking forward to learning a lot from the program.

Q. How important is education to you?

A. Education is extremely important. I was constantly telling my grandson that he needs his education to learn how to take care of himself and to get a job. I encourage all children to go as high as they can, because if they are willing, people will help them!

Q. What were you doing before to try to get your grandson to go to school, if anything?

A. I was talking to him, encouraging him to finish and go into the military, to get a job and be somebody and do something with his life. It just wasn't working. It took both Ms. Sadie and Ms. Louise to get through to him.

Q. Do you blame yourself or the system for your grandson's truancy problem?

A. Anthony was sent to school regularly. He would come home and say he had been to school. It wasn't until I would call the school or received a letter that I learned of the truancy. It was Anthony. He wasn't getting the help he needed. We have to all work together: Anthony, the school, and me.

Q. Have you noticed a difference in your child's behavior since both of you have engaged in the training?

A. Anthony has continued to have a slight behavior problem. He can be verbally disrespectful to me and my daughter, his mother. He was told he could not live in our homes and disrespect us. He will say something disrespectful, and after the incident, within 15-20 minutes, he'll apologize. So, I think he did learn something from the program. He had to leave my home for a little while, but he is back.

Q. How has your own attitude and parenting skills changed to accommodate this new situation, and how much can you attribute it to the training?

A. By my going to the classes, I learned to sit down with him, talk to him and listen to him. I saw him start to open up a little more to me.

Q. What is the most important thing the training taught you?

A. Learning that I wasn't alone, helping me to have more patience with him and not reacting angrily. I learned a lot about different experiences of other parents, and this helped me to be more comfortable with myself.

Q. What is your expectation for your grandson?

A. I want to see him continue his education, enroll in college or another training program. I encourage him to visit CCYD to talk with Ms. Louise about help in finding a school or job.

Q. Where do you see your grandson in 5 years?

A. He needs a good job so that he'll be able to take care of himself in another 5 years.

Q. Was the training beneficial to you?

A. Yes!!! Without a doubt, it was beneficial. I really learned a lot and enjoyed coming. The young parents called me "grandmom." I learned a lot from them. I shared my way and they'd talk about how it is for them today.

Q. Would you recommend this training to other parents in the same situation?

A. Yes, I would recommend the program for all parents.

Q. Was the training beneficial to your child, for example, doing better in school, improved behavior?

A. Yes, it was beneficial to Anthony. If it wasn't for this program, Anthony would not have made it (to graduate). It was a blessing. I can't thank staff, especially Ms. Sadie, enough for working with him.

Q. What did you like best about the program?

A. I enjoyed participating in the program with the children. It gave me the opportunity to work with my grandson and other children. I would encourage parents to go to this program because it really did help me. It will help them to deal with their child's behavior and attitudes.

Q. Do you have any words of wisdom resulting from attending the program?

A. Any parent that comes to this program will learn great things. Some parents don't want to go. They just want to sign their child out of school. They have to have patience, listen to the child and support them in doing the right thing. Don't say to your child "I don't want to hear it." Listen to them. Go together to meet with the teacher, principal or whomever and get the matter straight.

"I just love you all and will stop by to visit you soon. I will never forget CCYD. You all are my best friends. Thank you for everything that you have done for my grandson, Anthony, and my other grandchildren and family. You really are a blessing!"

Sasha Ibarra

Skills Training for Parents and Youth

The following is an interview conducted by Esmeralda Doublette, Graduate Intern at CCYD, July 2005.

ED. How old are you?

SI. I am 16

ED. Did you have to go to court? How did you feel about going to court?

SI. Yes. I really didn’t want to go, because I did not know what the results were going to be. I heard they give you or your parents fines. I was just scared.

ED. Whom do you live with at home?

SI. I live with my Mom.

ED. How important is education in your family?

SI. Hum…kind of important. Some of my family did not make it out of High School so they would like to see me make it out of High School and be somewhere in life.

ED. And, how do you feel about that?

SI. How I feel? Like I should do it… Yeah I want to do it.

ED. How long have you been cutting school?

SI. Just this year, this is my sophomore year.

ED. Why did you cut school?

SI. Because it was hard for me to get up in the morning. I was tired; I did not know what to wear the next day to school.

ED. Do you blame yourself or the school system for not going to school?

SI. It was really both…it was mainly me, because I just really did not want to go and all. It was kind of boring too; I did not like it, but I just have to learn now. So, I just have to go. It (education) gives you knowledge and all.

ED. Do you think your behavior will change after this program or will you go back to your old ways?

SI. When I am not in school what am I going to do? Nothing. Like, some of my friends will be in school and I am not in school, and I am by myself what am I going to do? So, I might as well just go.

ED. What are your expectations for yourself? What do you want to be in life? How do you plan on getting there?

SI. I want to be a Cop or a Correction Officer. That is what I want to be. I want to finish up High School, go to college, and go to the Police Academy.

ED. Where do you see yourself in five (5) years?

SI. Achieving it. I see myself being a Police Officer.

ED. How did the training program change your perception on the importance of education?

SI. I learned that I need to go to school, because being here (the training program) is like going to school again. You get out of school for a couple hours then you have to be in school again. They teach you stuff; I’d rather go to school in the morning, and not come to the program.

ED. What was the most important thing you learned while in training?

SI. They taught me to look at “what is out there for you?” They taught me “you are safer in school, because your parents may think you are in school, and something may happen to you”. So, I am really safe in school, and I am getting an education. Out in the street I am not doing anything.

ED. What did you best like about the program now that it is almost over?

SI. What did I best like? I like how they teach you things, like how to communicate with little kids and how to listen. They tell us about job skills and resume writing. I did not learn that in High School.

ED. Do you have any words of wisdom for other young women like yourself going through the same things?

SI. I wish they learned their lesson (after the training). That is all I can say.

Sasha Ibarra is a 16-year-old sophomore at Camden High School

We have been successful in retaining parents and students in the training program. Classes could potentially be bigger, and hold up to 30 parents. The parents and students, who come to the training, complete it successfully. Students' grades improve and they attend classes regularly. We monitor progress by comparing past report cards, six (6) months after completing the program.